Carl

Look at my new baby! Isn't it pretty?! He is a Beaver Creek BCB05 4 string acoustic base. He is 124cm tall and 42cm wide at the bottom. The case is huge and looks like it could hold a cello! I love it but oh man do my fingers hurt!

The Simpsons is better with...um...uh...

Rabbit and Mouse

What an absolutely hilarious little production! Up there with the Angry Alien 30 second bunny movies for sure, if a little lower tech. This is Rabbit and Mouse from Meerkatmedia. They are basically flash videos of black and white drawings about the misadventures of a rabbit and mouse. They have a MySpace page here but their website with the actual videos is here. Anyway, here is a video they did called "you, a rock, or nothing". I was totally betting on the rock to win, dang.

No TV and No Beer Make Homer...something,something.

So what do you do when you don't have cable? Go outside? Read a book? Write your thesis? NO you fool! You turn to the internet:

There are sites that are hubs to take you to videos of TV and movies posted on the internet. For example, Alluc.org, Ch131, FreeTVonline, and SurfTheChannel. Besides that many TV stations from CTV to MTV have a lot of online content (in fact most networks have many of their shows viewable online) I am so not going to make a list of them (it's called Goggle boys and girls). Although many channels have video that is not viewable in Canada due to copyright laws (but you can get around that sometimes by going through a Canadian channel that carries the show, such as Global for SNL videos) . That being said, there are sites like wwiTV that give you links to hundreds of TV stations with online content, broadcasts, and streaming video from all over the world (there are like 6 music TV stations from Poland, who knew?). There are quite a few wacky stations out there (the Canadian ones are the standard fare, mostly CBC, there are a lot of online religious channels from the States). Beeline TV is much the same but arranged by language of the station instead of country of origin. These sites can't possibly list all stations though and they don't.

Now of course there is YouTube for all your video needs but there are other similar sites that are more geared towards movies and TV like vid2c, DivX has Stage 6, Megavideo, and Veoh has a lot of movies and videos (but sometimes the content is restricted to members).

Don't worry D, life without TV ain't so bad (though I guess I do have those 3 fuzzy channels), eventually you'll learn to live again. Welcome to the world of goal oriented watching, where TV isn't the background noise of your life. And, as always, TV is better with the simpsons:

p.s. Unfortunately, I could see this actually happening. Ha, ha! Imagine a whole thesis worth of "no TV and too much beer make Denise go crazy! Urge to kill RISING!"):

A Chickens! Cultural Moment: Twelfth Night

Shakespeare on the Saskatchewan was the first professional summer Shakespeare festival other than Stratford and Toronto. Unlike Calgary's sumer theatre it is held in tents by the river which are set up and completely torn down every summer. Also, while it is done by professional actors it costs money. Anyway, was rally good and I was pleased.

Die Hard

There seems to be a bit of a theme but I can't quite put my finger on it...hmmm.

Here is a video which answers the age old question, "What if Die Hard were a 20's black and white silent movie?" Some mildly offensive racial slurs and they take out all the violence but they had their priorities mixed up back then.

For Carrie...

sorry I couldn't find one that was more gluten intolerance friendly but this fits you better I think.

Educational Sidebar: Badgers

Badgers are Mustelids (members of the Weasel family) and are related to such smelly and/or angry animals as wolverines, ferrets, otters, fishers, martens, and minks. Yeah sure he looks cute but he'd kill ya soon as look at ya. They are the only carnivore in Canada that burrows after and eats other burrowing animals, so we like them here because they eat things like ground squirrels (and anything else they can get there claws on). The species of badger that occurs in North America is the North American badger (Taxidea taxus) which is somewhat related, but quite different from the European badger (Meles meles).

Badgers are very distinctive looking, especially their faces (a good way to tell between the Euro and north american badger is by snout length). Badgers have a noticeable white stripe that runs down the top of their head as well as black cheek patches (called “badges” which is how badgers get their name). They are about 60-90 cm (2-3 ft.) in length and generally weigh about 7-8 kg (15.4-17.6 lbs.) for adult females and 10-14 kg (22-30.8 lbs.) for adult males. Badgers have a sort of “flattened” appearance because their hair is short on their backs and long on their sides (also because they have stubby little legs). Their forefeet are actually much larger than their hindfeet (all the better for burrowing with grandma). Badgers are quite highly adapted for digging and can actually dig up to a metre deep in a minute! Now is that a probe or a test he's digging because I doubt that takes screening into account.

Now to the good stuff. The Taxidea taxus' (left below) dental formula is I 3/3; C 1/1; P 3/3; M 1/2. The P4 has a medial shelf and a hypocone. Transverse rows of cusps on the M1 are distinctive, yet exhibit some variation within the genus. The m1 has a well-developed trigonid and a talonid with a central hypoconid and entoconid.

This is in contrast to Meles meles (right) which has a much more flattened M1

(Pop Quiz: which one is more omnivorous?).

It has a relatively short rostrum, and robustjaws at the rostral end of the skull and at the base it has a triangular shaped occipital and enlarged tympanic bullae. The "wrap-around" jaw hinge means that lowerjaw cannot be removed from skull. Male badgers have a prominent sagittal crest which increases in size with age.

This is all because I saw this awsome badger in a den the other day. I love seeing wild badgers!

Also, badgers are better with the Simpsons:

German is better with the Simpsons

Here is that same episode from the last post but in German. At least I think it's German. I wonder how well it translates?

The "Chickens" How To Guide (vol.2): Bettin' on the ponies

The first thing you need to learn about bettin' on the ponies is how to read the racing form. Racing forms are sort of like the periodic tables of horse racing. There is a whole bunch of information crammed into a small space but it is only useful if you already know what numbers are where and what they mean.

Yes you can just go and randomly pick a number (which I have done), or colour (which I have also done). FYI the same numbers are always the same colours. Or, if you are a little more advanced, on the coolness of the horse name. But I feel it is important not be ignorant (or at least attempt to be conversant with basics of anything you are going to spend money on) so here is an interactive tutorial on racing form literacy.

At the top of the page for a given race will have the number of the race (say 2 if it is the second race), the type of race it is (say 6 furlongs), what sorts of horses are competing, what the purse is, weights, and any other general info about the race itself, as well as any allowed combination or multiple bets. See the tutorial for the rest.

Now that you know all the info you need to pick your winners (like if it has a cool name), here's how to bet.

Straight or Single bets:

This is the simplest and most common bet placed on a single horse. Obviously the more complex (and unlikely) the bet, the higher the payoff (that's why they call it gambling boys and girls). But this isn't always the case because the payoff is based on the odds given, but also on how many people make the same bet as you do. So, for example, sometimes the payoff on a bet to show on a favorite horse to win is higher than the to place payoff. Straight bets include:

Win bet. Simple, you bet on which you think will win. If they do, you collect. Usually the posted odds are based on returns on a win bet.
Place bet. A wager for place means you collect if your selected horse finishes either first or second.
Show bet. A wager to show means you collect if your selected horse finishes either first, second or third.

Combination Bets:

Combinations cover from two to four horses to win in chosen order. Any given race will always allow all straight bets, but will only allow certain combination bets (these will be listed on the racing form next to the number of the race). Combination bets include:
Quiniela. A bet placed on two horses to finish first and second in either order.
Perfecta or Exacta. A bet placed on two horses but they must cross the finish line in exact chosen order.
Trifecta. A bet placed on three horses to cross the finish line in exact chosen order.
Superfecta. A bet placed on four horses to cross the finish line in exact chosen order.

Multiple bets:
Bets across multiple races different races. Low odds, high pay outs. You won't win these unless you drugged the horses. Some common multiple bets include:

Daily Double: Similar to an accumulator you select the winners of the first and second races on that day. You must place your bet before the start of the first race.

Pick 3. This wager requires the player to pick the winners of three consecutive races. Some race tracks have a rolling pick 3, which is when the player must pick three races in a row and it continues for the next three races. Also comes in pick 4 or even 6.
Parlay or Accumulator. A kind of 'let-it-ride' bet. Making simultaneous selections on two or more races with the intent of pressing the winnings of the first win on the bet of the following race selected, and so on. All the selections made must win for you to win the parlay. If a race is a tie, postponed or cancelled, your parlay is automatically reduced by one selection; a double parlay becomes a straight bet, a triple parlay becomes a double. A parlay bet can yield huge dividends if won, but good luck with it.

OK so you know what race you are betting on, what horse(s) you want, and what kind of bet you want to make. So now what? Well, the minimum bet is usually $2, you go up to the nice people behind the counters who want to take your money and say, "number 3 to win in the 5th" and give them your toonie. Well, don't say that EVERY time unless you only ever go to race number five and only like to bet on 3. Anyway, you get the idea. For a quiniela you might say "$2 quiniela, numbers 5 and 6". If the results of the first two horses are either 5-6 or 6-5, you win.

There are also special sorts of bets in which you box out multiple horses for a bet. These cost more, but you are slightly more likely to win. For example in a Quiniela Box you pick three or more horses. You win if any two of your selections finish first and second. To bet you say "$2 quiniela box on 4,5 and 6". You are making three separate bets so your minimum bet is $6. If they finish 4-5, 4-6, 6-4, 6-5, 5-4 or 5-6, you win. You can box as few as three or as many as the field (all the horses in the race) but this costs more.

With a Trifecta it is much the same. For a straight Trifecta you say "$2 trifecta numbers 7,4 and 5" and you win if they finish in that order, but with a Trifecta Box you pick three horses to finish first, second and third, in any order. To bet you say "trifecta box 2,3 and 5." You are actually making six $2 bets, so your total bet is $12. If they finish 2-3-5, 2-5-3, 3-2-5, 3-5-2, 5-2-3 or 5-3-2, you win. More commonly there is a Trifecta Key in which you pick your favorite horse to win, then two or more others to place and show in any order. To bet you say "trifecta key on 1 with 2 and 3." You are actually making two $2 bets so your total bet is $4. To win your Key horse must win and the other two must finish either 1-2-3 or 1-3-2.

Anyway, I've never made one of these kind of crazy bets myself. I like to stick to my little $2 bets and hope to break even and maybe make a few pennies to pay for a snack. This isn't too hard to do making easy bets and, even if you do lose all night, if you stick to your little bets you won't be out more than the price of a movie and popcorn (as D would say). Well that's it for this installment of how to do fun stuff. I couldn't find a horse racing clip but at least I can say that gambling is better with the Simpsons:

p.s. Just think of them as big dogs!

The "Chickens" Concert series, Part 4: Buddy Buy

I was also privilaged enough to see the blues legend Buddy Guy play at the Bess Gardens. Now that's good blues! Among other things, he went out into the crowd (see below), cussed out a guy for not listening to his stories, and rambled on incoherently about guitar players he's known and even imitated the guitar stylings of such musicians as Eric Clapton and Jimi Hendrix to illustrate. Good stuff!

Chickens! Concert Series # 3: The White Stripes

Though woefully ignorant about the particulars of the White Stripes' awesome Canadian tour, I was the happy witness to both their official concert and the secret show at Eastview Bowl on July 1st. What a way to celebrate Canada Day! Both concerts were amazing (for different reasons)! The real concert itself was great (we had amazing seats) but a little different because we were sitting down (it was at the TCU), but I think that added to it because no drunk people could spill beer on you. The stage was all red and had a candy striped drum set on the left and a bunch of keyboards, guitars, etc. on the right. They played some faves from their albums, some new stuff from Icky Thump and a bunch of different things (hmmm stuff and things). During the encore Meg sang "In the Cold,Cold Night" while Jack hid behind the drums and played the simple background guitar. I bought a poster it was great. Overall I'd say different and brilliant!

Here is their website and here is their myspace. Also, even though there was a request for no video, some rebels out there took video anyway. Of course, being a good girl I didn't but that doesn't mean that I won't benefit from those who did (until it is ripped off Youtube that is). It's a fine moral line but what are ya gonna do.

At the bowling alley:

At the concert (can you spot me down there?):

Also, like everything, White Stripes are better with the Simpsons...

Update: Turns out we were especially lucky to have had the opportunity to see them because they have decided to scrap the rest of their tour (the American leg) due to Meg's anxiety and say they won't tour anymore!